[The Engineer gestures with his head to the Teleporter. [1] Check the bottom of the product, the sides of the container, the lid, and the necks of bottles. For most men, no time at all. The will. Engineer: Yeah. Heavy grabs one of the detached tentacles and heaves it off to one side, then walks over to the Demoman, who is carrying a case of beer under his arm. You want to be my lover?! Spy: [growing more irritated] I'm crying and the Eiffel Tower has stink lines coming off of it. The Pyro can also be seen engulfing the monster in flames. Miss Pauling: Scout, it's Pauling. [Medic looks at the Heavy, then flips the handle of his Medi Gun. The Heavy's bulk is apparent on the left as compared to the Scout's relaxed pose with his feet on the dashboard. You left seven witnesses, guys. Please. [A security camera tracks their movements as Miss Pauling adjusts her glasses.]. Spy, look at this. ], [The Scout reaches over and with his right hand, and exits out of e621.net, then pushes a button on the monitor. [The flute continues to trill in the background. Scout: Oh thank God. 1. The Soldier then takes his bucket and picks up a loaf of bread dropped by the Medic. Expiration Date - YouTube Tf2 Soundboard - Instant Sound Buttons | Myinstants 1. The camera pans from the rear towards the front while a heavy drum beat plays. For example, on November 13th, 2020, iFunny[5] user Ashrom made a Now Draw Her Giving Birth meme that referenced both "Expiration Date" and Murrlogic1's Wonder Bread Commissions (shown below, left). The RED Demoman takes a quick spin on the Teleporter and disappears. 'v' Cut to a shot of Miss Pauling on a scooter, speeding towards RED Base. As his wobbles precariously on the Teleporter as it slows down, we can see that he is also festively clad in a sombrero and novelty Margarita shaped sunglasses while also carrying another beer]. [Cut to a close-up of the timer, which ticks down to two seconds. They stop as he holds her up and looks at her. and our We're not dying! Fuzzy dice adorn the rear view mirror. ], [In the classroom, the word DEMEANOR is now written on the board as the Spy continues to educate Scout, who is busy drawing a picture of Spy being came on by a Protogen. [Cut to a shot of the room behind them, which is decorated with ribbons, balloons, streamers, and various themed decorations while rocking jazz music plays. Just before the tentacles are about to be inserted, the Sniper arrives at the battle, and after a brief moment of aiming, shoots the tentacle holding Scout, freeing him from its grasp. Engineer: Well yeah. ], [Scout can be seen reading a book titled Pick-up Lines for Fast Food Junkies. Cut back to Scout and Miss Pauling.]. Minusve're not bread. It really said yelps.). Where have you been sending it?! A dead BLU soldier can be seen draped on the roof of the van. Medic: [cheerily, gesturing slightly with a half of the throbbing loaf] Tumors! In the short, characters Engineer and Medic discover that tumors appear in bread upon being teleported, with the bread becoming aggressive. I get one day off a year. 6. The Spy calmly places a wine bottle on a cart and inspects two wine glasses. Soldier: [brightly] Hello, Miss Pauling! Scout: [nervously] Yeah. At 10:36, angered at Soldier's teleportation of bread, Medic smashes the Specimen #384 jar, freeing the juvenile Bread monster seen playing with Pyro at 14:42. In all subsequent shots, the Medic's backpack is missing. The Heavy looks at his Sandvich, sniffs it, shrugs, and continues eating.]. Spy: Our first dying wish is Scout's. Looks like I will be burying bodies all weekend. The Soldier attempts to extricate the BLU Demoman's body from the hood of the van. The post received over 36,000 likes and reblogs in seven years (shown below, left). Cookie Notice . Meet the Sniper - Official TF2 Wiki | Official Team Fortress Wiki The logo is pock-marked with bullet holes and the white paint has been scraped off the sides. Here you've drawn me having [The camera tastefully remains on his face.] A loaf of the bread falls off of the pile and Soldier gasps and grabs his bucket more tightly. The bread monster turns his attention towards the Pyro, and immediately has its mouth filled with fire. ], Scout: Hey, hey Miss Pauling! ], Spy: I'll do it. Scout reaches for the bucket of chicken with a grin on his face, but Spy slaps his paw away. Gentlemen, synchronize your death watches. [The Medic and the Engineer are discussing something, but turn to Scout when he addresses them. The dance scene is interpreted within the action/fight scene. salem ymca after school program / warframe account migration ps4 to pc 2021 / expiration date tf2 copypasta. [He salutes. I Have Done Nothing But Teleport Bread for Three Days, This Is Where I Watched My Parents Die, Raphael. Easy Ways to Read Expiration Dates: 8 Steps (with Pictures) - WikiHow Cut to a shot of Miss Pauling on a scooter, speeding towards RED Base. The Heavy still leans nonchalantly on the fridge door. It lets out another roar.]. The Heavy looks harassed and brings the vehicle to a stop. The furry, however, is unimpressed.]. (Note: captions read "diner")[He opens the door to reveal the maw of a giant bread monster, who lets out a loud roar, all while an epic orchestra plays.]. He attempts to mimic the Spy's actions, but instead sends the dummy flying into the Reel-to-Reel player behind them. Ahh- sweats nervously, [She is dragging a body. Scout: We both got buckets of chicken. An example being. Spy: Oh, Scout. The Heavy looks harassed and brings the vehicle to a stop. At 6:08 when Spy is pouring a drink, the liquid flowing out of the bottle is black but becomes a translucent amber color as it fills the glass. The Engineer turns. [The cab's rear door abruptly opens and the Soldier steps out, and with his right hand, hastily pushes Scout's snout into his seat. Miss Pauling: [Her expression darkens] Scout, I'm here right now. ], Engineer: That goes for all of ya. Deep chimes accent the moment], [The strings slow then stop. ], [SPY'S SMOKING ROOM: 58 HOURS TIL DEATH Cut to rear shot of the Spy sitting back in his leather arm chair. The mercenaries' expressions show varying degrees of interest. Ow. Cut to black. It hates me so much! ], [The Spy now walks behind the table. If not, I gotta kill him. [he tosses it and draws another while the Scout giggles] The Eiffel Tower having sexual congress with me. Privacy Policy. [The strings slow then stop. Engineer: [Laughing] So, we're fine. It also holds a bucket of drumsticks, red roses, a vase, and a box of RED chocolates. [The Soldier suddenly grabs the Scout by the neck and slams him onto the table, because he is a furry.]. Ominous sounding strings start up. Spy: Oh, Scout. As the van drives in, a wooden prop of a cactus with some desert plants pops up and a painted curtain background falls into place, disguising the entrance.]. He triumphantly celebrates his arrival with a crate of beer with limes wedged in the necks, his grenades on his vest removed to carry bottles. He adjusts his hat and headset with both paws. medic! As he does so, he turns around, casually hits the button with his fist, and points at the Spy as he walks away. The camera angle is also slightly higher up than in the final video. Spy can be seen walking around Scout as the camera rotates around him in the opposite direction.] Spy, look at this. [The Engineer gestures with his head to the Teleporter. Cut to Scout and Miss Pauling, who are also looking up at the ceiling]. All right? He returns the glance awkwardly. The windshield has bullet holes on the left and is completely knocked out on the right. Totally not the expiration date script. [2] Team Fortress 2 Wiki June 11, 2014 Patch. It's Been Two Years Since This Meme Started, Think, Mark, Think! She looks at him quizzically in silence. Copypasta Scripts of All "Meet the __" Videos. Hmm. 4. how long does an embezzlement investigation last. The Engineer intervenes raising his hands. Scout grabs a hold of her and, making use of the dance moves he learned from Spy, keeps her safe from harm. While the entire film was planned a year in advance, actual production of the short took about six months. Wait. Soldier has a grin on his face, Demo looks concerned, and Spy looks very worried. Light flute music plays with a soft drum accompaniment. This is identical to Scout's recoil in, At 2:43, when Demo comes back through the teleporter with the beer, he does the same animation as the, At 3:26, there is a pinball machine depicted by a. Later, the Scout can be seen sitting at the head of a long banquet table. He returns his eyes to the road. Miss Pauling: Not everybody, Soldier. ], Miss Pauling: [Yelling] What the hell is that!? You are amazing with ladies. The Heavy is somewhat intrigued, but the Soldier is utterly amazed, reaching out with both hands to grab the loaf. You are better than me. Spy, look at all of this. The Scout tosses the keys. tl;dr . The Heavy slowly folds his arms.]. Pressing the one button you're never supposed to press? Suddenly the Engineer bursts in through the door behind them.]. Tell me you got the briefcase. The dove from earlier flies at the monster and is promptly eaten by it. Heavy and Medic pause and look at the bread monster with fear in their eyes.]. The Heavy is somewhat intrigued, but the Soldier is utterly amazed, reaching out with both hands to grab the loaf. He looks back at the door. Do you have any idea what's in a briefcase that-- [Miss Pauling spots the watch on Scout's arm] --Oh, oh! Miss Pauling: Scout, it's Pauling. [The camera cuts to a shot of the Spy walking behind Heavy's back. Scout turns back to Miss Pauling.]. A scene not present in the final video has Miss Pauling be seated at a candle-lit dinner table by the Heavy, who also takes off her helmet. Spy. Red embossing tape declares it a "DEATH CLOCK". Scout: Hey, hey Miss Pauling! Ah [Scout walks towards a door labeled Dining Area.] When the Soldier slams Scout on the table and strangles him, Scout chokes out "Not my fault." It closes its mouth as the bomb explodes. Spy: [rolls his eyes and gets off the door, light chimes and strings play] Make it quick. Miss Pauling's arrival at the RED Base is at daytime, and her scooter has a different, red-colored model. The Soldier stands with his arms akimbo. It also holds a bucket of drumsticks, red roses, a vase, and a box of RED chocolates. Suddenly a siren can be heard in the background with guards shouting. [Spy stops pouring, looks up, and turns towards Scout. The Scout bounces on his feet on the right, looking nervous. But then there was this monster and we shot it and we built a bomb and I think my leg's broken. Scout: [gestures to the table which holds another Teleporter, a loaf of bread, and an ashtray] Hey, look at all this. The camera goes from the poker table with the Demoman drinking, the Heavy and Sniper dozing, and the Pyro reading a magazine; to the Medic and Engineer in a lab, with the tumorized bread; and to Soldier carrying away a giant pile of bread loaves in his arms. Harry101UK, who attended Valve for winning the 2013 Saxxies, Illustrative Rendering in Team Fortress 2, https://wiki.teamfortress.com/w/index.php?title=Expiration_Date&oldid=3283837, This is the first Valve-made TF2 short to feature Miss Pauling, and the second to feature characters apart from the RED and BLU team (the first being the, However, some of the Engineer's lines are extracted sound files from Grant Goodeve. Spy flicks open his disguise kit, plucks a cigarette out of it, then snaps it closed again. Do you have any idea what's in a briefcase that-- [Miss Pauling spots the watch on Scout's arm] --Oh, oh! Miss Pauling: That was so much FUN! ], Spy: We are mercenaries. ], [All the mercenaries are expressionless except for the Heavy who is on the verge of falling asleep with his arms folded. It lets out another roar. Spy: [An expression of disbelief crosses his face] Yourself? The Soldier stops and examines his new bucket next to a sign pointing to the "LAB". What? ], [The blackboard has the results of previous teleporter experiments written on it. The track "More Gun" plays.] Scout and Miss Pauling look on, amazed, as the dove takes off and flies away. Everyone is wearing an odd watch with a large digital display. Everything you just said was insane and, we are out of time. Ominous bass strings play. While Scout shows some progress, Spy ultimately declares Scout a failure. can is punctured by a brass flourish. TF2 Heavy Ya-Dadada. The Medic continues to scream as he grabs onto the bread creature and attempts to pry it off. [brings out a flip notebook], [The camera slowly pulls back to reveal the body of the monster, which now lays motionless. The camera slowly pans to the left, revealing the Engineer and Medic with a pair of teleporters set up between them. I TELEPORTED BREAD! You know? Behind him, the Pyro and Spy are holding a bottle of wine and a bucket of chicken. Cut shot to the Scout who looks relieved at the hand being removed from his snout. Scout, meanwhile, runs up to the side of the bread monster and slams his club into it. Scout: What? Transcript [A lone RV is driving down a desert road.Camera cuts to the dashboard, where a bobblehead of the former Civilian sits. They wordlessly agree to jump into the mouth of the Bread Monster, which they proceed to do in the nick of time. Medic:I didn't say that! Wait! The Heavy looks at his Sandvich, sniffs it, shrugs, and continues eating. Soldier: [pulling out a card] You did not read mine! ], Spy: See you all in hell. [The Medic shakes up the jar he's carrying, which contains the bread creature from earlier. Soldier: [Leaning backwards] I have done nothing but teleport bread for three days. TF2 - You are dead. Its usually used (copy-paste) on a block of text that are either funny or 'troll' in nature to mess with another person. Spy: [sighing] Fantastic. Reading "Open Date" Codes. They enter the room that Soldier, Spy and Demoman are in and inform them that they are fine as long as no more bread is teleported. Both Scout and Miss Pauling look down at the wood below them. We are going to live forever! The Scout opens the door and peeks in.]. As the camera pulls back farther, the Pyro can be seen coming into the shot, who has the small bread monster darting around his legs like a puppy as they try to keep track of it.]. The screen cuts to black. [relaxes and chuckles] So yeah, Miss Pauling. before the Engineer interrupts them. The Scout is near breathless with laughter.]. (Note: captions read "diner")[He opens the door to reveal the maw of a giant bread monster, who lets out a loud roar, all while an epic orchestra plays. For more information, please see our As the Medic inspects the teleporter, the Engineer calls out to him. The logo is pock-marked with bullet holes and the white paint has been scraped off the sides. Expiration Date teamfortress 1.2M subscribers Subscribe 36M views 8 years ago Engineer and Medic make an unsettling new discovery while experimenting with the teleporter. We've been told Expiration Date was hilarious and it definitely didn't disappoi. Engineer and Medic make an unsettling new discovery while experimenting with the teleporter.Visit all of our channels:Features & Reviews - http://www.youtube. That isbig news. Klaxons start going off and red alarm lights begin flashing. At 11:48, Engineer is seen upgrading his level one sentry to a level 2 far away from the monster, but at 12:31 he is seen hitting a level one sentry right next to the monster, and then at 12:42 he is seen next to a level 3 sentry where his level 2 was. [She holds her hand out expectantly], Scout: Yeah. He eyes it worriedly.]. [toss and giggle] Both of us relaxing post-coitus. Go [bleep] yourself. Later, the Scout can be seen sitting at the head of a long banquet table. [The strings hold, then fade as the scene cuts to black. Spy: [rolling his eyes as he draws another card] Yes I see. Suddenly, a Red Bread truck screeches into view from the right, knocking away the can and fishtails, nearly ripping off its rear bumper. The healing beam latches onto the Heavy, and the Medi Gun crackles with energy as the berCharge is deployed. Medic: Where?! I'd like to go on a datewith Miss Pauling. About. Oh my God, you set off the briefcase alarm and you were having a prom for some reason. Then they realize. The RED Bread van's hood ornament reads 'Sword'. Scout: [in pain] Wait! For most men, no time at all. I guess it's a date. Expiration Date: Reanimated - YouTube A look of realization appears on her face. I need your help. He sits back down and slides out of his chair. The healing beam latches onto the Heavy, and the Medi Gun crackles with energy as the berCharge is deployed. chavara matrimony usa brides His brow wrinkles]. Expiration Date Sequel Script (LEAKED) spoiler nsfw. They're usually pretty accurate in my experience, at least for more distinct fonts. Spy: Well, a mystery we will take to our graves then. I'll put this date on myself! Scout: I'm wedging my head through a door here to tell you I'm sorry. Miss Pauling turns and shoots him with a silenced pistol. Cut to Scout and Miss Pauling, who are also looking up at the ceiling]. The Sniper tumbles through the gravel briefly before getting back to his feet and taking out his Kukri. Spy is surprised that Scout is doing surprisingly well. The Heavy is mildly amused.]. Goodbye. The camera pans to a shot showing all the mercenaries gathered around the table intently focusing on his words. You too. He pushes the cart which rolls to a stop in front of the Scout. Suddenly, a Red Bread truck screeches into view from the right, knocking away the can and . Ve all use the teleporter, let's say six times a day [Cut to the rest of the team, Scout is still rubbing his sore neck, the Soldier stands stoically, the Heavy still leans on the fridge door, Sandvich now half-eaten, and the Engineer replaces his helmet, backwards as usual. Half-standing, the Soldier examines the bucket.]. And this. The Engineer walks up to Soldier and Medic and places his arms around their shoulders.]. ], [As Miss Pauling walks towards the door, the scooter falls onto its side. Please. Um. A.M. Case the restaurant, run background checks on the staff. ], Scout: Lot of people busy with busyness. Another ring comes with the appearance of the text "www.teamfortress.com". An upbeat, funky jazz track starts playing. ], [The Spy pushes a button on the console and a microphone pops up. [He makes a gun formation with his right hand. The timer ticks down to one second as they leap straight into the open maw of the monster. In this first Episode the Medic and Engineer did Experiment's on the teleporter and discovered Russian Bread that they call "E girl" Bread. The Pyro can be seen dashing back to the battle, having presumably been knocked back by the bread monster. The Sniper tumbles through the gravel briefly before getting back to his feet and taking out his Kukri. He selects a rocks glass to pour a hard liquor.]. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Miss Pauling steps forward and turns to look at the bomb. [She points at the hangar they just exited from.] The windshield has bullet holes on the left and is completely knocked out on the right. Miss Pauling reacts and turns hurriedly from the camera. ], [The camera cuts to a shot of Spy and Scout in a classroom setting. ], [Cut to a close-up of the timer, which ticks down to two seconds. Spy: [smugly] Asking out that dial tone again, I see. He suddenly looks concerned and stops eating his Sandvich. Engineer: [Laughing] So, we're fine. Wait! 2007-2023 Literally Media Ltd. Hey Niko, It's Been 14 Years, Let's Go Bowling! Soldier has a grin on his face, Demo looks concerned, and Spy looks very worried. ], [The Scout looks back, confused, and turns forward, arms akimbo.]. - Question? Spy: [sudden close-up while the background music cuts off] The clock is ticking, gentlemen. Press Miss Pauling reacts and turns hurriedly from the camera.] Copy and paste your choice of scripts, featuring the "Meet the Team" videos by Valve. [He brandishes a BLU briefcase ] Miss Pauling: Not everybody, Soldier. ], Spy: See you all in hell. Scout backs up as one of the tentacles swipes at him. [he gestures to different parts of his body and spins around] Heh. We'll get it back, and the Administrator never has to know. The room is dimly lit with moonlight and the warm glow of the fireplace. It's still possible that it happened before, as, once again, there isn't much evidence. Why don't we discuss it over dinner? On June 18th, Redditor ThamosII posted an SFM image of Soldier teleporting bread which received over 1,600 upvotes in /r/tf2[4] in six months (shown below, right). ], [The Scout coughs and the Spy delicately places the second glass down. Recommended videos. The Scout is near breathless with laughter.]. It was a gloomy day. Bread Or Alive: TF2 'Love And War' Adds Bread Weapons [He removes the watch from his arm and gives it to Miss Pauling] See, that is where this all starts! I'm great with girls. Team Fortress 2 Expiration Date Reaction - YouTube Oh, I am so sorry Miss Pauling: [Looking up from the wires] God, Scout, what for? Scout: [regains confidence, he straighten his tail] You're probably real busy this weekend, right? [he snaps the case shut], [The camera switches to the mercenaries walking down a hallway. Well the Yeah, the thing is [Cut to a shot of Soldier, Spy, and Demo watching the monitors. Dispose of the body, replace him with my own guy no later than 4:30 [Spy looks down at Scout, and after a few seconds of thought, speaks]. Is the Demo back with the beer yet? Hello, my mission is for every person who goes onto this discussion, to type a part of the Expiration Date script that follows the previous sentence or two. Some of the witness corpses that Miss Pauling gathers are that of a Spy, a Soldier, and a Medic without a jacket. Cut back to Scout and Miss Pauling. The Spy rolls his eyes and shakes his head in amusement.] Miss Pauling briefly turns towards the scooter, as if to set it back upright, but instead continues on towards the door. We have the resources. It is now also available as a free-to-play ( since June 23, 2011) download on Steam for Windows, OS X, and Linux. I guess it's a date. Tf2 Soundboard; TF2 Demoman - Kaboom. You're terrible with girls. Give me your watch! He returns his eyes to the road. During the climax, Miss Pauling is holding a derringer that hasn't made an appearance in any other TF2 media to date. Now go! - What? He looks down, then chuckles sadly to himself. With Nathan Vetterlein, Dennis Bateman, Ashly Burch, Robin Atkin Downes. Army Combat Veteran Reacts to Team Fortress 2 Expiration Date ], [Scout motions for her to escape to safety. Goodbye! The Heavy remains at the fridge door, eating his Sandvich, but observing.]. Behind him, the Pyro and Spy are holding a bottle of wine and a bucket of chicken. [Soldier is grabbed by a tentacle, dragged over towards the monster, and then thrown into a pile of broken lumber. He points both his fingers at Spy, who merely shakes his head with disgust. The Spy walks slowly, passing front of the camera left to right, cigarette in hand.]. [He uses the dummy to slap Scout across the face, who looks up at him with a hurt expression in his eyes. ], [The background music stops and the van grows quiet. The Scout tosses the keys.